Past the sadness September 21, 2006
Posted by Alien Drums in Aging, Uncategorized.1 comment so far
Yesterday, I said something about the value of writing things down, basically that it helps you think. After I thought about it more I saw some of my stupidity. The error I made is in equating aging with understanding. I disparaged the wisdom of those in their 20s. I should have disparaged the wisdom of those in their 50s, like me, as well.
I work with some amazing people who happen to be in their 20s. Sometimes they surprise me with what they do not know; but at other times they surprise me with what they know. They know some things much earlier in life than I learned them.
But beyond knowing, those twentysomethings bring a real energy and excitement to life that is good for a fiftysomething guy. I love being with them, talking with them, thinking with them, working with them. I would hate to hang around only with people like me.
I’m going to leave up yesterday’s posting for two reasons. First, because there is some truth mixed in with the error. Second, it stands as a monument of sorts to my own need to continue learning and challenging my thoughts. I guess a third reason could be that if any of my twentysomething friends read yesterday’s post then I can always point them to this one and the confession of my error.
A wonderful sadness September 20, 2006
Posted by Alien Drums in Aging, Truth.add a comment
There is a wonderful sadness in growing older. Just as you begin to make sense of things, you realize your life will be over in not too many days. Yes, life becomes a series of days, not years. I suspect that as I get older life will be calculated more as hours, then minutes and finally seconds.
The sadness is not in dying or thinking of dying; it is in realizing that just as you are beginning to understand life, it will be gone. That’s a good reason to believe in heaven, for heaven holds out the hope of living while knowing how to live and also still learning more about living. At least that’s how I choose to think of heaven right now.
I find myself wondering if I am slow or fast in comprehending truth. Did most people figure this out much earlier than at 51 years of age or are they later, to come behind me, if at all, in this understanding? At the risk of sounding arrogant, I think I’m earlier than most, at least by today’s standards. But then again, none of us arrive at understanding; we’re either pursuing it or we’re just breathing.
Many people in their 20s think they have figured out life, but I wonder if they’ve really looked beyond the understanding of their youth. Of course, in many ways when compared with true understanding, I am but a youth. There is so much I need to learn or know or simply express. I feel the need to try to write down what I really believe, because in writing you see the holes in your thinking and you become aware of the beauty and sense of it all, as well. I must do this before I die.
